If you’ve thought, “Who am I now?” Or “What am I supposed to do?”, you are not alone. The idea of your identity being connected to a group of people or to specific leadership isn’t one that you alone have felt. I’ve felt it too, as have many others. During my years as a youth and leading into graduation, I was involved in many of the ministries: youth, children’s, quizzing, camps, and garage sales to name a few. Much of my time wasn’t my own. Until I went to college and started to devote time to my studies and work on school events, I didn’t realize how much time I needed to devote to the congregation. I spent at minimum two days every week there, which increased as events were included into the mix. Once I had left, I started to have more free time to devote to spending time with my family, building friendships, pursuing a bachelor’s degree and adding a full time job. When the increase to my time happened, I thought over why the change occurred and what about my life was different. The answer was simple, I was no longer involved at GCC, but the fleshing out was more difficult. I grew up in that congregation and truly considered it family. When I left, no one asked me why I’d left or where I’d gone. About six months after I left, I went to a service there with some friends. I was shocked at how many people didn’t either notice or care to ask where I’d been the last six months. I felt like a ghost. Half of my life, at the time, was spent with them and it didn’t seem to matter. It wasn’t till much later that I learned that once you left, you were written out of the membership and congregants who questioned where you went were told that you didn’t want to be contacted or they were told you are an apostate. I never went to leadership to tell them that I didn’t want to be contacted nor did I wish to end communication with them. Understanding now what I do, it makes complete sense that any public interactions were so awkward. I also realized that when you are kept busy with activities, group and camps, you are so wrapped up in being involved, that you hardly have time, if any, to think for yourself- to ask yourself, “What do I believe? And does what I believe and study match what they believe?”. There was no time to process. What you believed what was what you were told to believe. And, if you questioned, it was considered that you were challenging the leadership. Staying busy was a way in which people were less likely to ask where the church is headed, what the leadership is doing, and how exactly everything is working together. Dear readers, if any of this sounds like something you’ve endured, you are not alone. Throughout the years since I’ve left, I’ve clung to this simple truth that grows sweeter each day- your identity is in Christ! Not in what others think of you, not in what leadership thinks of you, not in what the world thinks of you. You are NOT alone! You belong to Christ and His love is fully yours! I know that there are a lot of difficult issues to work through and the road won’t be smooth, but you’re not doing it alone. Christ is right along side you, walking with you, loving you fully for who you are in Him, not in what anyone else says about you. I pray that as you have read this that you are encouraged that you are not alone in your sorrow and you are not alone in your joy. Life has been bittersweet and I pray that eyes are opened and minds and hearts are changed.